I started 2012 convinced that the end of the world could really happen. Not the Mayan version of the end of the world, but my version/perspective of the end of the world. I know, that's not a very positive thing to write about but it was sort of what was going through my mind last year at this time.
I felt like all areas of my life had been thrown under the bus and that I couldn't fix anything. I kept trying to fix and figure things out and was giving every attempt to try and maintain a positive attitude. Basically nothing was working out. I was nearly convinced that 2012 was going to be a terrible year.
What I couldn't see then, but what I can see now, was that it wasn't about everything falling apart; it was about God prying my fingers off of everything I was trying to hold onto so that he could bring new things into my life.
"Where there is no vision, the people perish".......Proverbs 29:17 (KJV) I had a vision for my future, but it was tiny, out of date, and I had created it as a result of feeling fearful and oppressed.
"No eye has seen, no ear has heard, no mind has conceived what God has prepared for those who love him."......I Corinthians 2:9 (NIV) I needed a fresh perspective but did not realize that at the time because I couldn't see anything but what was right in front of my nose!
So, not knowing what else to do, I began to take steps forward in faith and solve my problems, even though I didn't feel quite confident that I had the skills to do so.
And then everything really started to turn upside down. But I kept praying about everything and persisted.
And finally, I began to realize what I could solve, and what I couldn't solve. And I began to let go of problems having known I did the best that I could with what skills I did possess and let God do the rest.
And when I let go of everything, then I realized how amazing my life is and how many gifts and amazing people God has dropped in my life and how little my problems are compared to how big my God is and that I could learn new things and see things differently than in the past.
"Forget the former things, do not dwell on the past. See, I am doing a new thing! Now it springs up, do you not perceive it? I am making a way in the desert and streams in the wasteland."........Isaiah 43:18, 19 (NIV)
And with that, peace came back.
And while I was still dealing with a lot of overwhelming stuff, I also began to not feel so overwhelmed, at least not all of the time.
And suddenly 2012 wasn't so bad after all and I realized I still needed to walk in great faith even if it made my knees knock sometimes. I also realized that I had to move forward if I was to keep growing in my faith.
So forward I went......
(An Ukrainian baseball player with the last name Borsch? That is hilarious. I just had to share this with you for some comic relief..........this post features some of my favorite photos from 2012.)
In the end, 2012 wasn't so bad after all! And the best part is, there's a new year coming up right behind this one!
